I am typing this only with my left hand. It's taking a long time and is really difficult because this is not what I am used to. If I don't go slow I press the wrong letters and sentences end up like
"woo im sp fast at typung with my lrft hand... that actuakky wrnt better thab expected"
You cant even see the fact that I am struggling but I am. I'm gettinng better at it but it still doesn't feel normal. My right hand is dying to take over and be like "Yo dude, I got this, I can make this easier" because that is what It's always done. But I am determined to finish this paragraph using only my left hand. It's taken me a long time to do what is a 'simple' task because I have to concentrate to make sure I do not mess up. But i have done it.
That is what recovery is like. I have to go very slowly and sometimes I mess up. Nobody else can see how much of a struggle certain things are and my old habits are dying to take over just like my right hand was dying to take over the typing. Although it may seem simple "Just eat/Just be happy/Just do this and that and the other" In reality it's not as simple as it may sound. It's very time consuming and isn't what I am used to.
I am going slowly but just like rushing the typing if i try to rush recovery I will just end up making a mess out of things. So if the whole world can bare with me while my concentration is else where that would be much appreciated.
I'm not sure if this even makes sense, i hope it does otherwise i've wasted a lot of time on this post. I'd also like to apologize for that lack of posts, I am ever so sorry! I promise not to dessert you for this long ever again!
(This is a pathetic excuse of a post but there is no otherway I can think of to describe whats going on in my life at the moment)
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