HELP!

Dear blog readers,

Firstly I'd like to thank each and everyone of you for helping me reach 2000 page views, I didn't even expect to get 5 let alone 2000! My blog has also been read in 14 different countries how exciting is that! (Actually it's probably not that exciting but I really didn't expect anybody to read my blog). You are all fabulous!!

So here's the thing,  I need you fabulous people to help me. I'm not sure what kind of things my readers would like me to write about and need your suggestions. If there is something you'd like me to touch on please let me know! This could be anything whether it's serious or just a bit of fun.

I've recently had two suggestions, one person saying I don't write in my blog enough and should perhaps make it more diary-like. The other person said "You're blog is crap why would anyone even read it? Why bother with it?" (To which I could only reply- I don't know.)

So wonderful people I'm giving you the opportunity  to tell me what you want to see on my blog! If you haven't already noticed there is an option to 'Comment' on my posts. So if you could please comment (you can do this anonymously) about what you want me to write about or any suggestions of how I can improve my blog. Alternatively if you have me on facebook you can message me on there.

Once again thank-you so much brilliant people!

Yours Sincerely
Lydia x x x

Ps. How awkward/embarrassing would it be if I get no feedback....

I can't even put into words..

This is disgusting. Just like the mental patient costumes this "Anna Rexia" halloween costume is not okay. Anorexia is a mental illness and a very serious one at that.

I saw a post on tumblr once about a person whose family member got diagnosed with cancer and was told he had an 87% chance of recovery.

Only around 46% of anorexics completely recover and as many as 1 in 5 (that's 20%) of anorexia suffers will die prematurely. It is a deadly disease just like cancer is.

I understand that halloween is about dressing up and its just a 'bit of fun' but you wouldn't dress as a person who has a physical illness as opposed to a mental one.

I am actually disgusted. Stick to being witches or whatever it is people dress up as for halloween.

Don't do it!

If you have a friend who is struggling with an eating disorder it can be hard to know how to help them. This means a lot off the time people say or do the wrong thing. Eating disorders are very complicated and i'm still not entirely sure I understand them so how is someone who's never had one before going to understand? They're not.

But here is a list of things NOT to say to someone with an eating disorder (even if they're in recovery). All of these have been said to me and they're certainly not helpful.

"You look healthier" - This will be interpreted as 'You've got fat'

"What have you eaten today?" - This puts us in an awkward position. Chance's are we'll lie and pretend to have eaten a healthy amount to make you happy. On the other hand  we could tell the truth and see how disappointed you are and even worse you might decide to give us a long lecture about things we already know.

"If you think you're fat what does that make me?" - STOP. The way we see ourselves does not affect the way we see anybody else. We see you exactly as you are. Just because we might see ourselves as fat does not mean anybody who weighs more is instantly morbidly obese.

Anything that comments on the amount of food we've consumed. - things like "That's the most i've ever seen you eat" after pointing that out you can almost be certain that the rest of the day will be spent feeling guilty and possibly purging.  Or even "Is that all you're going to eat? That's not enough"  - Sit down and shut up. The fact that we've even eaten anything at all that day could be a major triumph. It makes everything awkward and could even put us off our food completely.

"Why are you doing this to me?" - We aren't. Its as simple as that. Eating disorders aren't some form of revenge we're not trying to get back at someone. We're doing this to ourselves and most of the time we probably aren't sure why.

I did have a long list of things not to say but unsurprisingly i've forgotten them all so this will have to do. I'm going to sleep, goodnight.

Talking to myself.

Recovery isn't easy. Recovery scares me. Recovery makes me hate my body even more. Recovery seems to involve lots of relapses. Recovery means somewhat losing control. Recovery will be worth it.
I always get mad at myself when I have bad days with regards to my disorder. It makes me feel weak, like I'm failing. The same way that 3 spoons of soup made me feel fat. I know the soup won't make me gain 10lbs and I know that even attempting recovery makes me strong. But the disordered thoughts, they aren't real. They just seem like it because they're inside my head. More than 3 spoons of soup will make me fat. If I drink more than 500ml of water I will gain weight. If I eat that I am going to have to hurt myself. If I eat this I'll have to restrict tomorrow. I can eat that but only if I go for a run. Thoughts aren't facts. They're not real, they're disordered. Tomorrow will be better. “Food is something I am going to have to face at least three times a day for the rest of my life. And I am not perfect. But one really bad day does not mean that I am hopeless and back at square one with my eating disorder. Olympic ice skaters fall in their quest for gold. Heisman trophy winners throw interceptions. Professional singers forget the words. And people with eating disorders sometimes slip back into an old pattern. But all of these individuals just pick themselves back up and do the next right thing. The ice skater makes the next jump. The football player throws the next pass. The singer finishes the song. And I am going to eat breakfast” Life Without Ed - Jenni S.