Today is one of those rare days in England where the sun is actually shining, and believe it or not, it's warm! I hate days like this. I love the sunshine, hate the warmth.
Warm weather means it's not normal to hide under 5 layers of clothes to keep warm. For most it means short sleeves and shorter shorts. For someone who began self harming in 2006 it means covering up from head to toe and boiling half to death. Well maybe not boiling to death but getting pretty close.
Sunshine and scars don't mix. While the rest of the world seem to be wearing weather-appropriate many self harmers are hiding behind sleeves and trousers. Me being one of those people. Don't get me wrong I am not ashamed of my scars, i'm not proud either, but i'm not ashamed. I am on the other hand embarrassed, it feels like everyone else in the world knows how to cope in ways which don't involve self-inflicted pain.
I honestly admire anyone who can walk around and not care about the looks and comments they get when people see the scars. I'd also like to point out to ignorant people that just because someone isn't hiding their scars doesn't mean they are 'attention seeking'.
(I went out and forgot to publish or even finish this post now i've lost my train of thought and it's freezing now instead of warm but whatever)
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