One of the suggestions I had about my blog is to make it more diary-like. Seeing as I don't know what on earth to post anymore and I'm 99% certain nobody's even interested anymore I've decided to give it ago. I'm not going to go into too much detail about what's going on in my life but I am going to try and put into words how I currently feel. I'm not sure why I'm doing this but maybe it will help some people to understand what goes on in my head.
It really bothers me when people talk about how I'm doing 'nothing' with my life. Its hard to listen to how much of a failure and disappointment you are and its awkward when people ask me what I'm doing with my life and I can just see them judging me for the fact i'm not in education and don't have a real job.
But what they fail to realize is that actually most days getting out of bed is a big deal, and some days if all i do is breathe then that's okay with me because even though I gave up on school and college and trying my best at everything I haven't completely given up on life.
I remember someone telling me once that because I wasn't in education that my life had 'no meaning' and I'm 'not much use to anyone' and even though that might be true it hurts when people point it out. If I had the energy and the right frame of mind to be doing something amazing with my life I would.
I'm not even sure why I'm writing this and i'm not sure if it even makes sense because I'm rubbish at putting my thoughts and feelings into words. So i'll probably delete this but whatever.
(Sorry for the amount of time between posts, and I hope you're all sorry for the lack of suggestions on my last post- kidding, kind of.. ).
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